A couple of weeks ago a good friend of mine asked me for my opinion on the quality of the sexual education I received. The project had for objective to point a finger at the educational system and address the fact that sexual diversity is not represented in classrooms as it should be. Here are my thoughts.

As I reflect as a 22 year old gay male on the quality of the sexual education I have received in my school years I’m left to wonder if my experience was atypical or if all kids go through the system and come out as uneducated as I did on the matter. Having gone to a catholic high school in a VERY conservative rich neighborhood of Toronto I can honestly say that my sexual education did not take place at school. As for my parents, they never gave me “the talk” and we respectfully avoided the subject of sex at the dinner table, so I was left to my own devices to figure out things. I learned what I know today by reading books and countless articles on the internet. I was also lucky enough to go to a university with a very substantial collection of books and journal articles on LGBT issues. It tremendously helped me answer questions I had.

My experience of sex-ed class was in retrospect more of a formality for the school administration than anything else. Sex-ed class in my high school consisted of a 45 minute period where all the boys sat in a classroom listening to the gym teacher tell us all about sex. With such a time constraint the teacher only covered “the basics” such as the female anatomy, the male anatomy and how people have sex (heterosexual sex of course.) No one asked any questions and we called it a day. Needless to say inclusion was not on the agenda. Looking back at the experience I still fail to see the educational value of such a rushed job. 

The greatest number of idiocies however I’ve had the privilege of listening to was not courtesy of the sex-ed class but of the mandatory religion classes that took place everyday during my four years of high school. During numerous hours I had to listen to teachers tell me that sex before marriage was just plain wrong, abstinence was the only way to go and abortions would provide you with a one-way ticket to hell. Not really the best approach in my opinion to address 14 year olds but I digress.

Homosexuality or anything that was not heterosexuality was not a subject discussed in classes, teachers would go to great lengths to avoid the matter and even if statistically speaking a percentage of students sitting in those classes were gay everyone turned a blind eye to it.

But the times are changing, from what I hear teachers and students at my old high school are talking about forming a gay-straight alliance club. This is a significant step in the right direction, something like this never would have gotten the approval of the school administration 7 years ago when I attended.

As for the Toronto Catholic District School Board I believe the problem comes from the fact it is stuck with having to teach the views of the Catholic Church; views that are not necessarily relevant in today’s context. Teaching a 14 year old that the only form of contraceptive is abstinence is irresponsible and borderline criminal in my opinion. 

The only way forward is for the TCDSB to stop hiding behind excuses and embrace and teach diversity to its students. There are 30,000 students in catholic high schools in Toronto, and more than a few identify as LGBT. Not acknowledging their existence is discriminatory and directly impacts the quality of the education they receive.

High school is tough enough on adolescents, LGBT teens in catholic high schools should feel welcome and appreciated and that will only happen with addressing homosexuality and sexual diversity in classes.

As for public schools the TDSB is from what I hear doing great work by conducting seminars with teachers and even addressing homophobia at large across the school board. The TDSB even published a guide entitled: Challenging Homophobia and Heterosexism that was distributed to every single teacher from kindergarten to high school.

It is my firm belief that it all starts at an early age, tolerance and diversity NEEDS to become an integral part of curriculums across all school boards. Much like the nuclear family is no longer the predominant model our children should be taught that some kids have two dads or two moms, that some kids have divorced parents or are being raised by adoptive parents. This is the reality of today’s society, we can no longer afford to indoctrinate children with heteronormative views that continue to stigmatize other children and only leads to bullying and homophobia.  

The true potential for change resides with children, and as much as we have come a long way in the past 50 years we still have a long way to go.